Were women as hypergamous as today in the past?

Some men say that women are hypergamous by nature. I was a teen in the nineties and I remember the male-female relationship at that time.

Let’s remember the 90’s.

At that time, no young girlfriends talked about remote holiday destinations. Back in the day, many women used to appreciate going on vacation to a nearby resort. Now, they want to fly far away or drive far away to go on vacation.

I don’t remember a woman asking her boyfriend or husband to buy an expensive car or going on vacation to an expensive resort. I also don’t remember a young woman asking her boyfriend to buy a house or taking out a mortgage. Men used to decide to buy a house.

In the nineties, I think that there were more male heavy spenders than female heavy spenders.

Back in the nineties, I don’t remember that a woman could admire a man just because he was rich. I don’t remember such a conversation in the nineties.  Poor women never expected to date a rich man. If a rich man married a poor woman, this happened by chance. This wasn’t a strategy. Today, I hear women systematically talking about their rich relatives. They talk about their assets like houses, luxury cars.

Women of the nineties

In the nineties, women automatically had better living conditions than their parents and they were happy about it. They didn’t expect to pressure their husband to get a rich lifestyle. Women didn’t apply financial pressure on men shoulders in the nineties.

In the ’90s, every woman wanted to get a job and there was almost no one who wanted to be a traditional housewife. Today, some women would like to stay at home and do nothing.

Financial expectations

Also, I have observed women from the nineties and as they got older, some of them increased their expectations towards their husband and towards men in general. In other words, hypergamy isn’t limited to the female millennials. It is a global issue. Let me give an example. I saw a woman who never got interested in SUV until she was 45 years old in 2005. For some reasons, since that time, she systematically wants her husband to buy SUVs. They had 3 big SUV since 2005. The price of every brand new SUV was twice the price of what they used to spend in cars before 2005.

This is not the only example. Close to my house, there is a vacation house. This was owned by a couple. The man is a construction worker and the woman is a teacher. They never spent money in the vacation house for the last 20 years. Suddenly in 2017, the woman asked for a $120,000 house makeover to turn this vacation house into a real house. The husband had to take a 10-year loan for it. Now, she lives on her own in this house apart from the family house from Monday to Tuesday but she is still with her husband.  This means they have to spend money on electricity, internet, water for this “new” house. In the nineties, I have never witnessed any situations where the woman triggered a huge expense.


Hypergamy is a new worldwide behavior. Some women understood that rather than working, they could use men and do nothing for the rest of their life.

This may sound strange because you may think that past=housewives and today=liberated women. However, the desire to be a housewife today is led by the fact that the man earns enough money. This is only possible because some job positions are so well paid today so that the woman does not need to work.